ok, so most of you saw on my FB status that alena was fed french fries and diet coke at the fair by my in-laws. i would like to vent a little more on this. i know that i can't keep junk food from her forever, nor to i want to (she did get regular cake and ice cream on her birthday, and will again this year) i look forward to making (and eating) cookies together. my mom used to pick me up from school and we'd ride through the drive-thru at dairy queen...but that was in middle school.
in a day of rampant adult and childhood obesity, i really don't see how anyone can argue against my wanting to keep alena as healthy as possible for as long as i can...i would like her to be able to eat mostly fruits, veggies and lean meats...not a steady diet of cheeseburgers, hot dogs, pizza and french fries. after all, these are the years her food is truly being used for nourishment to develop her body and brain.
ok, so you can guess all these reasons.
but my deal is this. it's a matter of respect for us as her parents. if the rule is that alena must eat with her left hand on her head, you can tell me that's silly and you don't understand, but at the end of the day, i'm her parent and everyone else needs to respect that. my daughter had eaten her dinner. she was full. but i look over and my FIL is crouched down in the corner feeding her french fries. i saw it. but i told myself "it's ok, it's the fair. 3 or 4 won't kill her. but then papa's fries were done and he started feeding her nana's. why?
then (this is when my blood started to boil) he's giving her diet coke. diet coke. with caffeine. with questionable sweeteners. and not just a sip, he's pouring it into her mouth until i finally spoke up. he looks up all bashful, then hides behind his wife and does it again. again, WHY? she can't ask for it, she was just as happy with water as she was with the soda. i get that they do a "what mom doesn't know won't hurt her" thing, but why be all sneaky like that? it just doesn't make any sense to me. and at the end of the day, they're simply disrespecting my authority as a parent. alena's at an age she's just now realizing that she and i have differing wishes and she needs to learn that mom's way she the one she has to obey. so why is nana and papa teaching her they can hide and sneak and manipulate and get something else?
i don't mean this to be a bashing session on my in-laws. i know they love their granddaughter dearly and they're just trying to have fun with her. but there are so many deeper, underlying issues way beyond french fries and diet coke here.
pray for me, b/c a 'come to Jesus' meeting is in order here... i don't know how it will go, but i'm willing to draw lines in the sand and stick to them if they make me play that way. right now, Plan A is for jared to talk to them (blood being thicker than water and all) but this water is strong and will create a flood if necessary.
next entry will hopefully be a light-hearted update on our newly usable basement!
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When I saw your fb post, I knew it had to be something like this. I'm sorry this is happening. I wish I could give you words of wisdom but unfortunately I've not been there, so I won't! Just know I feel for you and I know that you'll do the best thing for Alena. The inlaws may not like it, but she is YOUR child. Your decisions. Maybe they will understand that it's more about trying to hide it from you than the actual food. Hope it goes well!
ReplyDeleteJenn
Heather, I have to deal with this same thing...although SO FAR, they have only teased me about giving Z stuff. But even before I started him on BABY food, it was always like, oh, let him try this, let him try that...I love my in-laws to death, but I DO think I get to decide what my child can eat. Ok-mainly the tea or Coke trying is the issue. And the thing is, my nephew (Their other grandson) is 2 1/2 and has been drinking "coke" (watered down diet coke) for quite some time, and I TOTALLY disagree with this-BUT-I'm not his mom. But I will NOT be of the mind to let Zachary do that. He loves water, which is wonderful for him, so why spoil it?! "He needs to be exposed...." MY FOOT-kids today drink WAY too much juice and other drinks. I just like water and milk (and the occasional Coke) and I've turned out fine. Good luck with the "talk" and maybe the situation will get better.
ReplyDeleteYou have my complete sympathy. My FIL tried to pour Pepsi down J's throat at one year old. My FIL drink 4 to 6 a day and has serious acid reflux issues- you'd think he would notice that the pepsi exacerbates the problem, but so far he just thinks it's funny to rankle me. J is such a picky eater that I do my best not to fill him with sweets and junk food, but being mocked for trying to get my child to eat a healthy diet while I still have enough control to see that he doesn't consume his weight in sugar.
ReplyDeleteAnd Ellen- EXPOSED??? HA! That makes no sense. I'm with you.